So Blind.

Wake. Up. Call.
I haven't been on this blog for quite some time and, the last postings that I found were quite.. shocking. well, not too unexpected, but still.. I was a little bit ridiculous! I was inserting profanity anywhere i possibly could! haha, how immature. I was faced head on with how much pride, rebellion, and immaturity I had acquired. I know I was pretty bad, but MAN! I've been sitting in a prayer room thinking, "why do I feel like I have so much to deal with, why am I not moving forward?" and here is my answer. I'm still facing and debasing all of that anger and self-righteous stupidity. I can't expect months of sowing into that to just suddenly disappear from my heart. God showed me today as I cried out, "Lord, why can't you just increase my love for you right now 10 times as much as it already is?" He told me that he would give me a mile.. but that I would receive this "mile" of love inch by inch. centimeter by centimeter. day by freaking day! slowly. step by step. and all of these phrases are just expressing the exact opposite of what I wanted to hear. I wished it to be easy, quick, and painless. Ha, I still do. But, i know that after He's worked this slow process in me, I will find that it was more than worth it. ;]

abbie.